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instruction

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How to turn your landlord into a tent in 4 easy steps
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How to Pick a Perfect
Watermelon
Uniform Size	Orange	White
& Heavy	Elongated Field Spot Field Spot
Sweet	Watery	Full of Flavor	Little to No Taste
Smaller	Larger
“Webbing” “Webbing” Dark & Dull	Shiny
Bland	Sweet	Ripe	Not Ripe
How to Pick a Perfect Watermelon
According to Slovak Dads
Slap

with instructions like this how can you go wrong?

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IKEA cat instructions

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IMPORTANT:	IMPORTANT:	IMPORTANTE:
Head Betore Using Lire avanl usage Leer antes de usar
Operating/Salety Instructions Consignes de lonctionnement/sécurité Instrucciones de funcionamiento y seguridad
CRITICAL SAFETY NOTICE Before operating, you MUST give it at least two squeezes to rev it up.

How to deal with morons


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If the horizon explodes, pull car over to the shoulder until the fiery cloud of death has subsided
If your car has an erection for more than 4 hours, call a licensed mechanic.
If live power lines are flailing about, don’t be a pussy, drive under them really fast.
If your radio begins emitting
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